Do you think he should pay extra for the kids sports, even though he already pays $800/month child support?
My husband’s ex-wife has been giving him a hard time about not having given her a check yet for their son’s flag football. My husband pays her the court ordered $800/month child support for their kids religiously. We also have the kids every other weekend and he does all of the driving. We live two and a half hours away (his ex moved when she remarried) and he drives two and a half hours to pick the kids up and bring them back, and then does the drive again two days later. We obviously pay for them when we have them as well.
He’s always given her extra money for their extra-curricular things, however it’s not court mandated and she sticks to everything that was decreed in the divorce. She’s absolutely inflexible when it comes to anything. (For example she wouldn’t even let us have the for 4 days instead of two to take them camping with us this summer) She always says “I only have to do what the courts say.”
However, she’s lately been sending rude emails about the money for football. He’s assistant coach on the weekends he takes their kids back. She sent an email saying that he hasn’t given her a dime for the football and she’s going to let the coach know “to see what he thinks about that”. He said he has his checkbook but forgot and she replies “Tell me again how it’s my responsibility to remind you of your responsibilities?”
How would you respond to her emails? Money is tight, we intend to pay though, he just forgot. But how can she be so rude and demanding when it’s an extra thing and not court ordered. She’s remarried and her husband makes a 6 figure income. My husband is on disability and is presently unemployed.
I’m tired of her acting like he doesn’t support the kids at all (her words) and tells everyone that when he has the $800 a month automatically taken out of our account every month when he gets his check.
It’s your husband’s responsibility to settle any and all issues with the ex wife, mother of his children..I would not have anything to do with her and her issues with your husband, that is between them
He needs to responsed with the following:
‘ “I only have to do what the courts say.”
Why don’t you both split the cost of the extras 50/50?
Why are you negotiating anything with her? What is your exes role here? Oh, and disability generally – as in worker’s comp? – pays out pretty well…
I wouldn’t respond to the e-mails at all. It’s not about the kids, it about her hating your husband.
If you intend to pay it, the just send the check to whomever it needs to go to and send an email to her telling her its paid. If you are not going to pay it, send her an e-mail informing her it is not court mandated.
I am so glad I didn’t marry a man with previous baggage, not what you want to hear but your going to get alot of this until the kids are out of the house. Say no to paying for football or anything extra, $800 a month is crazy, he should really go back to court and ask to lower it, especially if he is disabled and unemployed.
Im sorry, but your in for quite a journey, I wish you good luck because you will truly need it!
Your husband needs to grow a spine and stop paying for things he’s not required to pay for. His ex is getting 800 a month in child support – there is nothing stopping her from using a portion of that for the kids’ sports activities.