I’m living in my sister’s shadow! Advice?
I am 15 years old, and I am the third child out of four children (first girl). I have two older brothers (the oldest had just moved out when my mom was pregnant with me, and now has a family of his own), the other older brother was ten when I was born (he now lives in an apartment across town). Then there is my youngeer sister, who is a year and ten months younger than me.
It seems like she has always been better than me at everything! She was always cuter than me when we were little, and she’s always been prettier than me! Someone has actually told her (right in front of me) that she was prettier than me. Not that I was ugly, because I know that I’m not ugly. She’s just prettier than me. Of course, the girl saw that I was offended afterward and told me that I was skinnier than her, which made my sister feel fat. I’m actually not that skinny (again, I’m not fat), but I’m not super skinny, so I’m pretty sure she was just saying that to “even things out”.
It always seems like my sister is getting rewarded and praised for things (not just by my parents).
She gets more attention from guys and everything! And I know that it sounds stupid, but on her birthdays, everyone makes a huge fuss about it, while nobody seems to care as much about mine.
Plus, she always has to be involved in everything I do! I am always trying to do things by myself (like acting and soccer) hoping that maybe people will have something to notice me for. However, whenever I try to join clubs and go to camp or take lessons or whatever, she always has to do it too! I have tried to talk to my parents about this, but they just tell me that I’m being annoying. And she always ends up being better than the things that I previously thought that I would shine in.
Ever since we were little, whenever would have friends over, my mom would always pull me aside before they arrived and tell me to “please remember to include my sister” in whatever we were doing. But my mom would never tell my sister that about me when she had friends over. Now as teenagers, she always feels free to just burst into my room unannounced. I never do that to her and her friends (in fact I try to steer clear). but she feels free to do it to me! And now some of my friends are always wanting to hang out with her when I invite them over!
I always thought that I was at least smarter than her, but just today she got invited to “skip the eigth grade” and go to a special charter school!
What can I do to get people to notice me a bit more? I feel overshadowed and unappriciated, and it’s really annoying!
Um John Letsu, first of all, you are extremely rude and probably a loser. Second of all my parents got married very young. They were 18.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HrqvMnYv9z8
Find the place you shine. There will ALWAYS be some one prettier, smarter, thinner…
Buy a flashlight.
i know how you feel its the same with me all i have to say is keep staying clear take some time to do things together and keep her busy so you can have some time alone. help around the house and im sure the real you will someday shine!
good luck
well,, prove to everyone u are better and u kan do way more,, and iif u kant do dat den do wat they zay iif u kant beat them joiin em,,lol do watever zhe doez and try to be good at iit together,, learn zomethiing perhapz thaat zhe doeznt know,, get iinto zportz do kool ztuff dat everyone kan zay yeah zhee iiz alzo zmart like her zizter or better yet,, zhe iiz zmarteer than her zizter,,
I don’t see it the way you do… my sister was always considered better than me, but I never really cared. I don’t know what you’re gonna do… find out what she can’t do and do it yourself. Don’t ruin your life because of one person.
By the way, your question was tl;dr so I only skimmed.
There isn’t much you can do, but don’t be mad at your sister because no matter what she is always your sister and she probably looks up to you.
Try to find something you’re good at, don’t tell her about it and practice it and one day bring it up, and show everyone you’re better lol.
Well, it does seem there is one thing you are really good at and that is teaching! Who has taught your sister how to do much of what she does? I bet it was you. You are so close to the same age group, that it is inevitable that you will end up with shared friends. Don’t let yourself get so upset. You need a movie night by yourself. Watch “27 Dresses” I think you will get it. And don’t quit trying new things, you will never know which will be “Your” thing to shine in.