Recently, it’s causing me problems, as I’ve already dated all of the men in our park. I went out with Billy Bob a few times, but he was way more into his taxidermy than he was me, and I just couldn’t compete with a stuffed possum. Then there was Billy Bob Joe, but between his squirrel hunting and bass fishing, he just really couldn’t fit me into his schedule. I had a fling with Billy Ray, but then his mom threatened to kick him out if he kept dating the “town tramp”. (I never liked her any way).

I thought it was going to work out with me and Bobby Joe, but his pregnant girlfriend put her foot down and that was the end of that. I tried a double date with Earl and Floyd, but they ended up getting into a fistfight after drinking too much while we were line dancing at the bar.

I need a man who don’t mind providing for me, and who also has a little bit of class. Also, a high school diploma or G.E.D.is a definite plus. I don’t want someone who will be threatened by an educated woman.

How do the rest of ya’ll meet men? Should I try a dating service or maybe start trying to meet them at church? Seriously, help guy! I’ve only got so long that I can be having babies and stuff. I need to get on the ball here.